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Writer's pictureChristina Cunningham Spinler

The Joy of Messiness: A Lesson from My Son's Stuffie Nest


As a therapist, I often talk about embracing our inner child—the part of us that loves to laugh, play, and sometimes, well... get a little messy. Today, my son reminded me of just how joyful and freeing that messiness can be.


I had just finished a session when I walked into the living room and found this scene: my son had gathered every single one of his stuffed animals, pillows, and blankets, creating a glorious "nest" for himself. He was in the middle of flinging himself into it, laughing like it was the best thing ever—and honestly, it probably was.


Seeing this made me pause and smile. Kids are so good at being unapologetically themselves, and they have this innate ability to throw themselves (literally) into fun. Yes, the mess can be a lot to clean up! I will not be doing that on my own. But, it's a reminder that life isn’t always about keeping things neat and tidy. Sometimes, it’s about letting go, diving into play, and embracing the chaos that let's face it - that's a big part of life.


As a kid, I loved making messes, too. One of my favorite memories is playing in the mud by the side of our house. I’d spend hours creating little structures, digging trenches, and getting completely covered in dirt. For me, it wasn’t just about the mud—it was about the freedom to create, imagine, and exist without worrying about what anyone else thought.


So here’s my gentle nudge to you (and to myself): Let’s invite our inner child out to play a little more. Let’s give ourselves permission to make a mess—not just the literal kind, but the kind that happens when we let go of perfection and let joy lead the way. Maybe that means dancing like no one’s watching, painting without caring about the final result, or laughing so hard we snort. Maybe it even means making a blanket fort or, yes, a stuffie nest.

The messiness of life isn’t just okay—it’s necessary.


It’s where creativity, connection, and joy come alive. So grab your “stuffies,” get messy, and remind yourself that life is meant to be lived with a little wildness.

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